OUTCAST: Trust, Friendship, And Injustice (Beauty 0f Life Book 9) Read online

  A sharp pain lanced his left arm, drawing Dan from his thoughts. His right hand flew to his burning bicep. Registering wetness, Dan realized he had been shot, and the angle meant it came from a high position. Sniper?

  Ducking into the alley, and behind a stack of crates, a crazy thought crossed his mind, as he automatically applied pressure to the wound in his bicep. Did Jon try to take me out? Crap, that’s stupid. What’s going on? Is this random or on purpose? Is someone from my military past attempting to kill me or is this a crime of opportunity?

  We Screwed Up

  2

  May 7

  TRF HQ – Men’s Locker Room – 6:50 a.m.

  Nick slumped to the bench as Bram, Ray, and Loki left the room. Loki and Ray rushed through dressing to run to Timmy’s for the team’s coffees, which Dan would’ve done had he been here. Bram hurried out to get away from Jon. When Nick announced Dan’s unscheduled vacation at the beginning of workout he received a mixed bag of reactions. As predicted, the guys pelted him with questions seeking details, of which he gave none.

  He rubbed a hand across his face briskly, recognizing they didn’t handle this situation right. Bram came unglued with worry and went after Jon, blaming him for driving Dan away. Their massive-sized combat and entry specialist verbally laid into Jon about how horribly Jon treated Dan yesterday.

  The situation only became exacerbated when Bram demanded an explanation for what he perceived to be unjustified, harsh conduct towards Dan. Jon initially provided no reason, but with the continual sniping, Jon crossly told off Bram, stating when he was TL, he could determine what was and was not justified, but until then his opinion didn’t mean squat. Those two glared at one another for the remainder of the workout session.

  Loki appeared both concerned and irate. His hurt showed as he kept asking why Dan would do this to them. He bemoaned Dan’s lack of faith in them and that he still didn’t appear to grasp they cared and would worry with no word, and they would help if Dan only trusted them enough to open up. Then Loki became angry with Dan for the same reasons.

  Ray attempted to play peacemaker and calmly expressed they all possessed lives outside TRF, and none of them must share every minute detail with each other. He also stated he would respect Dan’s desire for privacy before suggesting he and Loki do the Timmy’s run for the team.

  As expected, Kinsey, Lexa’s temporary replacement, didn’t weigh in on the subject. Dan had alienated her with his cold shoulder. She actually appeared a little relieved as if she was tired of putting up with him and the next two weeks would be a respite for her. Nick didn’t blame her.

  Although not rude to Kinsey, Dan certainly did not try to engage with her at all. Given Dan’s sentiments for Lexa, Nick now recognized Dan likely perceived Kinsey as a threat to Lexa’s spot. Understandable, though wholly unwarranted because if Nick had to choose, he would pick Lexa over Kinsey any day of the week and twice on Sunday. His surrogate daughter’s place would always be secure in Nick’s mind.

  He rubbed his face again. Last night did not go the way he imagined. They got off on the wrong foot with Jon’s wild accusations. Hell, that was an understatement … Jon blindsided him and Dan with his abusive words. Nick regretted not speaking to Jon before going to the bar.

  The hurt displayed in those soulful sapphire eyes spoke volumes, more so than the gravelly, raw pain in their typically stoic rookie’s voice, which Dan endeavored with little success to hide, as he explained Lexa dumped him. The tears in Dan’s eyes when he went into her room after she was shot should’ve been clue enough Dan’s feelings ran deep.

  Why didn’t I address Dan alone first? I should’ve known better, particularly after Jon rode Dan hard for no apparent reason yesterday. Nick cringed remembering the utter shock on Dan’s face as Jon crudely denounced Dan and told him he should’ve kept his pants zipped and Lexa deserved better.

  Regardless of their intentions or their concern for Lexa, both he and Jon crossed the line and betrayed all the trust they worked so hard to earn with Dan. The injustice of their actions, even his when he told Dan he only needed time to find the right woman, hurt a man they cared about. In retrospect, Nick believed those words inflicted the most pain.

  Sleep did not come last night as he lay in bed recalling Jon’s unrelenting diatribe placing all blame on Dan for breaking the rules and inferring Dan put the team at risk. Truthfully, after learning they had been dating since before Dan returned and exclusive for the past four or five months, Nick couldn’t point to a single shred of evidence to support Jon’s accusations.

  Nick’s shoulders slumped. I understand what drives Lexa’s motivations and behaviors. No matter how ardently Dan pursued her, if she were not willing, Lexa would not be involved. And she is … was. She betrayed Dan too … chose the team over a relationship with him. That would be a hard blow for any man.

  Our actions shut Dan down. No wonder he retreated and reverted to the damned yes, sir, and my fault, sir answers. Self-loathing surged, and in a rare, unrestrained act, Nick slammed his phone to the polished concrete floor, shattering it to bits as he shouted, “Son of a bitch!”

  Lost in his own tortured thoughts, Jon’s head jerked up at the sound. He stared at Nick, concerned by the uncharacteristic anger from his long-time friend. “Boss?”

  Staring at the myriad of plastic pieces scattered on the floor, Nick stated solemnly, “Jon, we screwed up big time last night.”

  Slowly nodding his head, Jon responded dejectedly, “Christ, I spewed out such garbage … hurtful things. The look he gave me when I claimed Lexa deserved someone better than him. Dammit! I didn’t stop to think. I focused on what I thought he said to Lexa and my assumption of how he treated her, unjustly laying all the blame at Dan’s doorstep. It takes two to tango.

  “I failed him. I treat subjects better. What’s wrong with me? Why the hell do I fly off the handle with Dan and assume the worst? I know better. Hell, Dan looked like shit when he arrived on the fifth. I perceived something bothered him but believed it to be related to the looming second anniversary of Brody’s death.

  “But then … after shift I overheard them in the parking lot of Timmy’s, and well, I didn’t catch the ‘not’ in his statement. Lexa stood there with tears streaming down before she jumped into her Jeep and sped off too. I recalled how he rudely dismissed the councilwoman and …” Jon trailed off as he searched Nick’s eyes seeking some sort of absolution. Finding none, increased his guilt and brought back how differently he behaved only two days ago.

  Rollback Two Days – May 5

  TRF HQ – 5:10 a.m.

  Jon studied Dan when he strode into the gym, arriving late for workout. The rookie appeared distracted and upset as he went straight for the heavy bag. Dan’s haggard features and weight loss became noticeable. And this morning, tardy … that didn’t happen with Dan. Jon moved closer, hoping not to catch a whiff of alcohol, but kept his tone light. “Dano, you’re late.”

  Dan’s, “Sorry, sir. Won’t happen again,” concerned him, but not detecting alcohol, Jon decided not to push the issue. Having gained some hard-earned insight into his rookie, he understood whatever demons currently chased Dan, his primary sniper was not ready to talk.

  However, what irked Jon was as Dan put in his earbuds, Kinsey demanded, “What’s with him today?” with a hint of derision in her tone. Jon rounded on her, biting out, “Give him some space.”

  He recognized Kinsey’s frustration, but she was not a member of the family, and none of them would air their laundry with her. Jon realized that to their temporary officer, it might appear they accepted Dan’s surliness and the cold shoulder he gave her.

  Though, in truth, they only cut him some slack because they were more worried about his recent uncharacteristic behavior. Jon chose not to explain because Kinsey didn’t need to be made aware Dan possessed a past filled with events which might be the cause.

  Loki and Bram tried once each to give her a cursory answer, telling her this time of year isn�
��t pleasant for Dan, but no one wanted to elaborate further after her snide remark that Dan must suffer from male PMS. Her comment fell flat and not one of them laughed. She got the message and backed off.

  When Bram raised his brows and moved back to the weights, shifting closer to Jon to speak quietly and asked if he thought this was about Brody, Jon gave a slight nod and said, “Have you tried talking to him?”

  “Yeah. He’s shutting me out this time too. Perhaps he is still blaming himself for Lexa’s injury.”

  “Perhaps. Though this feels different somehow.” Jon picked up a dumbbell.

  “You chat with Boss?” Bram lifted a weight too.

  “A little. He recommended I keep tabs on him but give Dan space to work through this on his own. Boss isn’t his usual insightful self.” Jon began his bicep curls and wondered about why Nick had been distant and closed-mouthed the past week but chalked it up to anxiety over Lexa’s health or perhaps problems with Christiana. Long distance relationships were complicated, but Jon hoped Nick would eventually find happiness even though Christiana took a job in another province.

  “Noticed that also. I think Lexa being shot rattled Boss to the core. Brought up old, bad memories of Janie and Martin. Ever since he’s been more closed off too. Lexa almost dying shook up our team in many ways, and we are all still a little off-kilter.”

  Jon nodded. “Hope to hell we can prevent Dan from crashing.”

  “Yeah, me too.” Bram glanced at Dan, sighing as he considered his teammate’s current state. I’m not so sure his mood is related to Brody. I wish he would confide in me. I thought I developed a level of trust with him.

  Workout continued in a somber mood as Jon viewed Dan’s exertions and wished to help him with whatever haunted him. Perhaps I should try contacting Blaze or Jim. They might know what is going on in Dan’s head. He silently vowed to keep an eye on Dan and catch his teammate if his demons tried to push him off the edge into oblivion.

  An hour and a half later, as they all suited up in the locker room, Jon continued to worry about Dan. His sniper remained inwardly focused as he powered through an intense workout. Afterward, Dan prepared for shift in record time, which was not odd, the ex-soldier never tarried in the showers.

  “So, anyone got ideas?” Loki asked, hoping to engage Dan in prank planning … anything to pull him out of his apparent doldrums.

  “You mean the prank master is out of ideas?” Ray teased as he closed his locker, ready to start a new day.

  “Noooo. Just thought you all would want the opportunity to provide input on hazing Kinsey. She’s been with us several weeks now, and well, we need to make her feel welcome.” Loki shot a glance at Dan. He still didn’t understand why Dan was so distant and standoffish with the new TRF reserve officer covering for Lexa.

  “Shaving cream in boots,” Bram suggested. “Classic.”

  “Nah. Need something with more pizzazz,” Loki said.

  As they discussed how to prank Kinsey Peltora, Jon noted Dan ignored them entirely and appeared lost in his thoughts. Worried, he tried to engage him. “What do you think, Dano?”

  Facing him, Dan’s expression indicated he was clueless about the conversation, and his words confirmed it. “Sorry, wasn’t listening.”

  “Doing a lot of that recently,” Jon retorted, all humor fading. His worries about Dan grew in the past week. His head didn’t appear to be in the game, and he continued to treat the rookie as if she were a leper. Behavior Jon didn’t expect from Dan, especially after the reception Dan himself received from the team when he joined.

  After Dan deflected by saying, “Sorry, a few things on my mind,” Jon let it ride when Ray attempted to lighten the mood and give Dan an out for his lack of interest in welcoming the temp.

  “Girl trouble?” Ray quipped, perceiving the difference in Dan lately.

  “Something like that,” Dan answered noncommittally.

  “Well, time you start paying attention, or you’ll end up benched,” Jon said as he strode out, wanting to find Boss to pick his brain. With the anniversary of Brody’s death coming up, he needed to chat with Nick. He refused to allow Dan to be sucked into suicidal thoughts again.

  Present Day – May 7

  TRF HQ – Men’s Locker Room – 6:55 a.m.

  Jon’s focus returned to the present. “I wish we had spoken before meeting with Dan. You should’ve told me you caught them kissing at Lexa’s party. I might not have gone off the deep end with him yesterday.”

  Realizing his remark sounded like he laid the blame for his actions at Nick’s feet, Jon added, “Not blaming you. I’m accountable for my actions. I screwed up royally. I accept my part. I only wish I could roll back time and make different choices. If I had come to you with what I thought I overheard and discussed things first, we wouldn’t be in this mess.” Jon clenched his fists, the desire to hit something welling up in him.

  Nick nodded. “I’m not blameless. I should’ve shared with you, but I thought I had time to figure things out before Lexa returned. I didn’t want to hurt either of them … they are both too damn important to the cohesion of this team.”

  Exhaling a long breath, Nick shook his head. “I’m at a loss for how to fix this and worried we irrevocably broke Dan’s trust. We treated him unkindly and callously hurt him right after Lexa broke his heart.”

  Jon rose, the need to rectify the situation burning in his gut. “I’m going to call him. I must apologize. If we don’t have any warrants or critical calls after we finish inventory, perhaps we can call it a patrol day and you and I can swing by his apartment to talk?”

  Remaining seated, Nick said, “I still think he requires the time off. He needs to come to terms with Lexa choosing the team over a relationship with him. Dan’s head will not be in the right place. He could get hurt on the job in that mental state. Take more risks.”

  Jon’s mind bounced between two camps, somewhat agreeing with Nick but also applying his knowledge of Dan. “I understand your point but now that I’m thinking more clearly, I’m not certain time off is the best course of action. We both recognize how restless Dan becomes and how he tends to process things better when he is busy. Idle time to stew on things is probably the worst thing for him now. We also cut him off from contact with his support system.

  “Dammit, this is the conversation we should’ve had before last night. I did it again. I failed to listen to his side before jumping down his throat. What is it about Dan that does this to me? I don’t do this with the others.”

  Nick stood and placed his hand on Jon’s shoulder. “It might be because Dan is similar to you in many ways or that he is different enough too. You two possess an interesting dynamic and don’t always view the world the same way. Possibly it is because you know things about him none of us do. You sat through all he said in the hospital after he found out about his lungs.”

  Jon peered at Nick. “That makes what I did so much worse. He is an honorable man who protects others before himself, and I’m aware of what he endured and lost. Yet I still said Lexa deserved better.” He dropped his head into his hands. “If Bram finds out what I did.” He blew out a heavy breath. “He’ll turn me into cat food. I screwed up so bad … I’m the one putting the team at risk.”

  Nick’s expression revealed his thoughts.

  “Yeah, I messed up with Bram too. I’ll make up with him somehow without revealing the real reason for Dan’s absence. Dissention on the team is a recipe for disaster.” Jon squared his shoulders and prepared to face his team in the briefing room.

  A Soul in Jeopardy

  3

  May 7

  Alley – 7:00 a.m.

  Adrenaline pumping through his veins, dulling the pain in his bicep, and reawakening his somewhat dormant soldier senses which kept him and his unit brothers alive for six years, Dan tugged out his earbuds. Peeking over the crates, he scanned the quiet street beyond for the presence of a continued threat. Clear for the moment he stole a glance at his bloody arm. Yeah, only
a graze. Not too deep, but gonna leave another scar.

  His gaze returned to the rooftop across from him, searching for the sniper, analyzing the situation, and weighing prospects for the perch. The stench of rotting food in the communal dumpster in the alley obliterated any other odors. Given his location, an older section of the city occupied by mostly elderly residents with infrequent pedestrian and vehicular traffic at all hours of the day, reduced Dan’s worry for civilian involvement.

  Though instructed not to contact any of the team, Dan realized TRF needed to be aware of an active shooter. After retrieving his cell from his front pocket, he clamped his fingers around his wound again to stem the oozing. Choosing Boss’ contact, his thumb hovered over the button as the hairs on the back of his neck prickled with a sense of danger and his ears picked up a soft footfall.

  Before Dan could reach for his k-bar and pivot to check out who stood behind him, a voice ordered, “Drop the cell, raise your hands, and turn around or I shoot.”

  Dan partially complied. Releasing the hold on his arm, he stood and turned while lifting his hands, but didn’t drop his phone. Dread crept in as he faced two masked men aiming pistols with suppressors at him. He noted their positions, assessing his options. One closer than the other, but even with his speed and agility, both were too far away for an effective offensive move.

  I’m at a significant disadvantage. I might be able to grab my knife and disable one, but the other will have the opportunity to fire before I can disarm him or take cover. Drawing on training, attempting to slow things down and gain a modicum of control, Dan remained calm. “What do you want?”

  The same voice as before came from the man closest to him as he demanded again, “Constable Broderick, I said drop your phone.”